Are you loving the people in your life or are you controlling the people in your life?There is a difference. Control is born from fear, not love. When raising children we need to provide guidance, boundaries and safety for them to flourish. We as adults have the same needs. When we love and care for someone we concern ourselves with their well being also. Many of us try to achieve perfection in every aspect of our lives. This applies particularly to relationships. When we fail, we do not question our perfectionism we simply try to control even more. Perfectionism is nothing but a lack of trust, and lack of trust originates in fear. With raising children that fear is our concern they will not turn out to be the type of person that we want them to be. Often it comes from the worry that people will judge us not to be a good parent. Therefore, we put more time and effort into being the perfect parent. As adults, we transfer our need to be perfect on to our adult roles. We work hard to be the perfect employee, the perfect partner, and the list goes on.
It is hard enough controlling ourselves without the added burden of controlling others. I will let you in on a little secret, being the Policeman of the Universe is exhausting! Don't get me wrong, it is possible to have everything you want in your life. You simply do not get there by being controlling. Trying to control your life is like trying to control the weather. Look at the level of concern there has been on the lack of rain lately. The focus on lack caused worry not rain. The rain came when it was ready. Surrendering to that, trusting in that takes the pressure off.
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| Confused Love Quotes |
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| Confused Love Quotes |
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| Confused Love Quotes |
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| Confused Love Quotes |
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| Confused Love Quotes |
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| Confused Love Quotes |
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| Confused Love Quotes |
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| Confused Love Quotes |
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| Confused Love Quotes |
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| Confused Love Quotes |
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| Confused Love Quotes |
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| Confused Love Quotes |
Acceptance of life and acceptance of your circumstances releases the pressure. Trying to control everyone in an attempt to control every outcome does not lead to happiness. It stifles your creativity, and dims your light. If loved ones feel unsafe expressing their true selves, they will only do what everybody else wants. You will not get to see their magnificence just a projection of who they think you want them to be. Is that what you want? This may lead to a 'happy' home but it comes at a very high price as they lose themselves in the process. This is how 'people pleasers' are created. Many perfectionists are people pleasers themselves and feel burdened by having to be and do so much for others.
You can choose to let go of the attachment to the outcome. You can let your light shine and experience the freedom that comes with that. You can listen to your inner wisdom that tells you that no amount of worrying will have any bearing on the result. You can choose love not fear. You can choose a life free from anxiety and tension.
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